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“But my child doesn’t comply when I offer “Yes-When deals” Instead of obeying, he throws tantrums or hits!”

Text Box:  Everyone wins with “Yes-When deals”, regardless of your child’s response.  Here’s why:  If your child does not give you the compliance that you are requesting in your “Yes-When deal’, then you withhold the privilege that he wants.  If (or when!) your child tantrums or hits, you continue to withhold the privilege.  It’s “magic.”  Your child eventually (over the course of his entire toddler-hood/child-hood/adolescence) learns a very valuable lesson: “Tantrums get me nothing and nowhere,” and “I can earn many privileges without throwing a tantrum or hitting (by just following along with some simple ‘Yes-When deals’!”  If you view the “Yes-When deal” as a way of life and a long-term tool, then you will be able to view your child’s resistance, tantrums, or aggressive behavior simply as a necessary early part of the long-term learning process.  Have patience, set reasonable criteria in your “Yes-When deal”, and maintain consistency. 

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